Thursday, November 17, 2011

Diary of an Unwilling Air Force Wife: I think I need to move

This week has solidified my strong desire to move off base. Forget the stained white carpets, the lack of fenced yards, the supremely expensive electricity bills, and the ridiculous rules. I now have more concrete reasons. I really need to move.
At around 11AM on Monday, I took my dog out for our daily walk. It was pleasant enough outside to wear shorts and a sweatshirt and I walked along with my coffee in hand. I ran into another woman walking her two tiny little pups and I stop to chat with her when we both realized that we knew each other. We sat next to each other in a military spouses class a few months ago. We chatted for a minute and then each continued our walks in opposite directions around the housing complex. Somewhere on the other side, I ran into Kristine again. We stopped again, let our dogs sniff each other again, and chatted some more. I even put her phone number into my phone so we could get together at a later date. While we were talking, a young man with two puppies came upon us as he chased his dogs (sans leashes) down the path. His dogs of course stopped to meet our dogs, so he stopped too. I mistakenly called one of his dogs a husky when it was something else, but he was friendly and told us all about the breed(which I promptly forgot). Dog owners always have things to talk about. 
But then.
I have had this idea weighing on my mind that I really need to find someone whom I can pay to shovel the snow off our driveway when we're out of town this winter. I had thought to myself that a teenager would perfectly fit the bill, because they'd be eager to earn a few extra bucks and would be strong and able. With these thoughts darting through my head, and my normal social awkwardness making me a bit fuzzy, I said "You're the first teenage boy I've met on base" by way of introducing this driveway shoveling subject. 
"Ma'am," he replied, "I'm 21 and I'm in the Air Force."
Oops. I quickly and fumblingly apologized, and we stood there for a moment, a group of awkward strangers whose dogs' leashes were entangled in a giant web, keeping us literally tied together for a long minute of terrible silence. If it weren't for that, I probably would have run away immediately. One of us managed to change the subject after that interminable minute, but there was very little left to say. He gathered his dogs to take them back home and Kristine and I quickly said our goodbyes. Basically, we all wandered away in a confused and awkward haze. 
In my defense, the poor guy looked very, very young, and he had a young voice to match. And he wasn't wearing his uniform, so how was I to know? Oh, the wedding ring on his finger, you say? To that I say, shut up. Just kidding. I will never, ever, reference anyone's age, ever again. And I'd gladly pay the housing office $200 to shovel my driveway if I could take that moment back again. 
Obviously I have to move.
Oh, but that's not all.
Apparently the maintenance team is performing "winterization" tasks this week in all our homes. 
They sent out a letter informing us of that fact, but I forgot.
Yesterday, I was in the shower covered in soap and suds with my razor in hand when I heard the dog start to bark. Sometimes she barks when someone walks through our yard. But she kept barking, and barking, and getting louder and louder and angrier. I rinsed off as quickly as I could, threw on the nearest robe, and emerged, skimpy and dripping, to find out what was going on. 
"Hello?!" I called as I opened my bedroom door.
"Maintenance, Ma'am" came a loud strong voice, slightly muffled by my dog's incessant barking.
They apparently rang the doorbell, although I never heard it, and then just let themselves in.
I guess I should just be glad my dog didn't bite them.
Or should I be? Don't I want my dog to bite strange men when they come in my house and I'm indecent? 
 I really, really need to move. 

1 comment:

  1. Oh, wow. I hate those kind of weeks. I must say I am laughing though. I mean, in 20 years you are going to look back and say "remember when I was walking the dog and....."

    That is a bit scary your dog didn't bite them. Although aren't you supposed to get rid of the dog if they bite? My uncle and aunt had to get rid of one because of that. At least he barked the whole time. Still.....